Warning: This is part two of a three part “story”, so if you haven’t read part one, do yourself a favor and read it.
To refresh your memories, the five remaining players are: Carcillo, Downie, Westgarth, Konopka & Clutterbuck.
RD: It’s time for our next participant and it’s….no way! It’s Martin Brodeur! And he’s got full gear on!
Joey: I don’t think that’s gear, RD. Might just be some…extra padding, if you know what I mean.
Rob: Regardless, he’s a legend in this match and who knows how much respect he’ll demand as he steps into the ring.
RD: Brodeur’s not known for fisticuffs like a lot of these other competitors, but it looks like he’s willing to give it a shot.
Joey: He and Downie have paired off. Marty looks awkward but he’s holding his own.
RD: Marty might have an issue with the #14 entrant….it’s New York’s Sean Avery.
Joey: Whatever it is, Brodeur didn’t take too kindly and took advantage of Avery being turned away and tossed him out.
RD: Short night for Sean Avery, who’s not happy with being eliminated.
Rob: He just punched the official that told him he was out of the match!
Joey: We’re now halfway through the rumble, here’s #15, Winnipeg’s Dustin Byfuglien.
Rob: While Big Buff gets himself acquainted, Konopka just clotheslined Westgarth out of the match.
RD: Looks like Konopka will try to “acquaint” himself with Buff, but Buff is running around the ring away from Konopka!
Joey: And somehow, despite all this carnage, Dan Carcillo is still in the match.
RD: We still have Carcillo. Konopka chasing Byfuglien. Steve Downie, Cal Clutterbuck and believe it or not, Marty Brodeur all still in the ring.
Rob: IS THAT!?
Rob: RIC FLAIR IS HERE!
Joey: And Flair eliminates Byfuglien!
RD: Clutterbuck is Flair’s next victim!
Rob: He’s just eliminated Brodeur! Flair is on a roll!
Joey: He is just stylin’ and profilin’!
Rob: Can Ric Flair be stopped? He’s got to be the favorite right now.
RD: Ooh, until a shot to the back of the head by Downie.
Rob: Now Downie, Carcillo and Konopka are are stomping on Flair. They want to get Flair out before he eliminates them.
RD: The teamwork pays off, and the fans are very unhappy that Ric Flair has been eliminated. A short stay in the rumble, but made his mark.
Joey: We’re also getting #17, Ryane Clowe from San Jose.
Rob: Clowe’s trying to take his shot at Konopka. Konopka seems to be the King of the rumble thus far.
RD: Downie and Carcillo are still in this match, paired off and hammering away.
Joey: Clowe’s got a decent shot in this match. Not necessarily a fighter, but a tough customer and a big guy. He’ll be hard to eliminate.
RD: Oh wow, you will not believe who our next entrant is.
Rob: It’s the NHL’s all time second place PIM leader, Dale Hunter, representing Washington.
Joey: He’s trying to go after Konopka, the former Islander.
RD: Wonder if he thinks Konopka is Pierre Turgeon.
Rob: Konopka and Clowe are now double teaming Hunter. Smart move on a guy with over 3000 career penalty minutes.
RD: Hunter might have his hands full with these two, but #19 is Scott Mellanby, wearing a Florida Panthers jersey.
Joey: If memory serves, these two had some epic battles in the early to mid 90s.
Rob: Right now Mellanby is tied up with Clowe, but he keeps eyeing up Hunter. This is going to happen eventually.
RD: They’ve both gotten loose, and here they go! Mellanby’s no stranger to fisticuffs, he’s in the top 25 all time in penalty minutes.
Joey: These guys are firing away. Who will blink first!?
RD: Well, we’re now into the 20s, Pittsburgh’s Matt Cooke is now into the match.
Joey: Cooke’s still not fully recovered from elbow surgery a couple weeks ago. He had a metal plate placed into his elbow to help heal it.
RD: Cooke’s climbing to the top rope, very unusual for this type of match, but oh my!
Joey: He just elbow dropped Downie! Downie is hurting!
Rob: This was an easy elimination for Cooke. Using the elbow against the tired Lightning forward signaled the end of Downie’s day.
RD: Cooke’s now going after everyone in this match, using that elbow to knock everyone down!
Joey: Cooke might be unstoppable with that bionic elbow. He’s just thrashing through the opposition right now.
RD: He’s got more company with #21, Blue Jacket Jared Boll entering the match.
Rob: This is a great match; these seven guys are just beating the living hell out of each other.
Joey: We still have yet to see some of the big names in this rumble. Who knows who will be next??
RD: Meanwhile, you still have Hunter and Mellanby, both over 45, hammering away with each other.
Rob: Konopka and Clowe have slowed; both guys are semi resting in the corner.
Joey: Boll is mixing it up with Carcillo and Cooke, trying to prevent Cooke from using that elbow again.
RD: Hey, look what we’ve got here. #22 is bringing us Todd Bertuzzi!
Joey: Hold on a second, who is that behind him!?
Rob: That’s Steve Moore! He just jumped Bertuzzi before Todd could get into the ring! And he’s beating away on the Red Wing!
RD: We’ve got to get paramedics out here; Bertuzzi seems to really hurt from that attack.
Joey: I don’t think Bertuzzi’s fit to compete tonight, being stretchered out of the arena.
RD: In any event, we still have seven guys in the ring trying to become the last one standing.
Rob: Carcillo’s been in there an awful long time, our #6 entry. He’s got to be getting tired by now.
Joey: If there’s one thing I know, it’s that Dan Carcillo won’t quit. That pest just won’t go away.
RD: The field is now expanding to eight as we welcome #23, Tyler Myers.
Rob: Myers was my pick early on and he’s a mammoth of a man.
Joey: The 6’7 Sabre is going to be tough to knock out. He’s a machine.
RD: That machine just eliminated Scott Mellanby with ease.
Rob: Dale Hunter just punched him in the face and Myers just glared at him.
Joey: See you later, Hunter. Hasn’t taken long for the young kid to make his mark on this rumble.
RD: Myers just chokeslammed Matt Cooke!
Rob: A lot of guys around the league have wanted to see that for years now. Myers is now a hero.
Joey: Konopka just eliminated Clowe. That was a long battle between those two.
RD: Incoming! We’ve gotten a new competitor, former Shark and current Oiler, Ben Eager!
Rob: Konopka is just resting in the corner after his last elimination.
RD: Myers with another chokeslam on Cooke, this time, over the top rope and onto the floor!
Rob: The crowd loves that! There’s no way anyone stops Myers ton…
Joey: Eager just pushed Myers over the rope as Myers was glaring at Cooke!
RD: So much for your pick, Rob.
Rob: Eager is staring at something in the audience. He seems distracted from everything going on behind him.
Joey: It looks like that young woman in the front row has lifted up her shirt! Puppies!
RD: Eager’s mesmerized. He’s got no idea that Konopka is right behind him.
Rob: Konopka dumps him over the rope right near that young lady.
Joey: She doesn’t seem too happy that he’s been eliminated. So much for more puppies.
Stay tuned for the thrilling conclusion in Part III!