Posts Tagged ‘Zenon Konopka’

We’re all in the run of the mill regular fantasy hockey leagues where guys like Henrik Sedin and Henrik Lundqvist get big points.  But what about the other side of an NHL roster?  Where else can Zenon Konopka go #1 in a league but in a “goon” league?

This season six friends and I started a Goon League on Yahoo, where you get five points per PIM and one point per hit.  (Yes, I know hits don’t necessarily make a guy a goon but we needed another category.)  Unfortunately, there is no way on Yahoo (or ESPN) to give additional points for suspensions (I could have used some extra points from Kris Letang’s this week).  To be honest, I’m in three head to head leagues and the one I care most about is my goon points league.  It’s something different from the same old regular fantasy leagues.

As most people aren’t familiar with this type of league, here’s a couple tips for goon leagues:

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Last season: 32-40-10 74pts, 5th Northeast, Did Not Make Playoffs

Additions: Mika Zibenejad, Nikita Filatov, Alex Auld, Zenon Konopka, Erik Condra, Mark Parrish, Mike McKenna,

Losses: Cody Bass, Jason Bailey, Ryan Potulny, Andre Benoit, Curtis McElhinney, David Hale, Derek Smith, Marek Svatos, Michal Barinka, Mike Brodeur, Pascal Leclaire, Ryan Keller, Ryan Shannon, Lee Sweatt,

Offense: The Senators, once again, are hinging their offense on the shoulders of Spezza and Alfreddson. If healthy, Alfreddson should be a 60+ point guy but it’s very up in the air just how much steam he has left. A healthy Alfie would be of great benefit to Spezza as well who still had a pretty solid year outside of a shoulder injury last season. Outside of them, and perhaps Foglino and Michalek, its a rag tag bunch of guys who you may not expect to do a whole lot. Well we know what you will get out of Zenon Konopka, but thats not necessarily gonna get the Sens out of the cellar.

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Warning: This is part three of a three part “story”, so if you haven’t read part one & part two, do yourself a favor and read them.

To refresh your memories, the three remaining players are: Boll, Carcillo & Konopka.

RD: We’ve got three guys left in the ring, and a fourth is coming to join them, by the name of Jordan Tootoo.

Rob: He was your pick, wasn’t he RD?

RD: Yes, he was, and he drew a favorable Rumble position.

Joey: He’s mixing it up with Carcillo right now.

Rob: I still can’t believe that Carcillo is in this match.

RD: This has been a great match so far, and we still have five more entrants to come!

Joey: In fact, I think it’s time for #26.

RD: Yes, and a matter of fact, it’s Dallas Star Steve Ott.

Rob: Carcillo sees Ott and seems to have a second wind.  These two are just trading shots!

Joey: Boll and Tootoo are trying to double team Konopka, but Konopka just banged their heads together.

RD: We’re now down to the nitty gritty with #27 George “the Animal” Parros entering the ring.

Joey: What’s the first thing Parros does? Goes right to an empty turnbuckle and bites it.

Rob: He just ripped that thing off with his teeth! And is eating it!

Joey: I haven’t seen such a display since the late 80s!

RD: He just threw the turnbuckle stuffing into the face of Tootoo!

Rob: Tootoo is blinded and walked right into a Boll Slam!

Joey: Tootoo might be out, but Boll can’t get him eliminated with Konopka beating on his back.

RD: Here we go, #28 is none other than fan favorite Paul “BizNasty” Bissonnette! (more…)

Warning: This is part two of a three part “story”, so if you haven’t read part one, do yourself a favor and read it.

To refresh your memories, the five remaining players are: Carcillo, Downie, Westgarth, Konopka & Clutterbuck.

RD: It’s time for our next participant and it’s….no way! It’s Martin Brodeur! And he’s got full gear on!

Joey: I don’t think that’s gear, RD.  Might just be some…extra padding, if you know what I mean.

Rob: Regardless, he’s a legend in this match and who knows how much respect he’ll demand as he steps into the ring.

RD: Brodeur’s not known for fisticuffs like a lot of these other competitors, but it looks like he’s willing to give it a shot.

Joey: He and Downie have paired off. Marty looks awkward but he’s holding his own.

RD: Marty might have an issue with the #14 entrant….it’s New York’s Sean Avery.

Rob: Avery has jumped in front of Marty between him and Downie. And seems to be doing some sort of hand gestures, with his back to Brodeur.

Joey: Whatever it is, Brodeur didn’t take too kindly and took advantage of Avery being turned away and tossed him out.

RD: Short night for Sean Avery, who’s not happy with being eliminated.

Rob: He just punched the official that told him he was out of the match!

Joey: We’re now halfway through the rumble, here’s #15, Winnipeg’s Dustin Byfuglien.

Rob: While Big Buff gets himself acquainted, Konopka just clotheslined Westgarth out of the match.

RD: Looks like Konopka will try to “acquaint” himself with Buff, but Buff is running around the ring away from Konopka!

Joey: And somehow, despite all this carnage, Dan Carcillo is still in the match.

RD: We still have Carcillo. Konopka chasing Byfuglien.  Steve Downie, Cal Clutterbuck and believe it or not, Marty Brodeur all still in the ring.

(WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO)

Rob: IS THAT!?

Joey: IT CAN’T BE!! (more…)

RD: Welcome everyone to the first ever Crimespree Rumble! I’m Good Ol’ RD, along with my partners Joey the King and Robby the Brain.  We have 30 entrants, one for each NHL team.

Rob: Last week on the show, we had Montreal’s Max Pacioretty seriously injured in a match against Zdeno Chara, and as a result, MaX-Pac was taken off on a stretcher and will miss the Rumble.  No doubt the Montreal representative will be out for revenge tonight.

Joey: We also had a trade this afternoon of entry numbers between the Maple Leafs and Bruins.  The teams swapped entry envelopes before looking inside.  Here’s our first entrant, and it’s….

RD: Colton Orr, representing the Maple Leafs!

Rob: Looks like the Maple Leafs finally got their #1 pick! Haha!

Joey: The #2 entrant is Flames tough guy Raitis Ivanans.  Orr and Ivanans should give us a heavyweight start to the Rumble!

RD: So, King, Brain, who are your picks to win tonight’s Rumble? Personally, I like Nashville’s Jordan Tootoo as a sleeper pick.

Rob: I’m going with Buffalo’s youngster Tyler Myers. He’s going to be a tough elimination.

RD: And while Ivanans and Orr continue to duke it out, here comes the #3 entrant, Flyers enforcer Jody Shelley.  Shelley’s had a history with both guys, including KO’ing Orr in 2010.

Joey: Getting back to your question, I think Parros has a good shot tonight. He’s got the power of the stache!

RD: These three are really duking it out, but the #4 entrant is about to come out. It’s Colorado’s Cody McLeod.

Rob: You know, in his second career fight, McLeod took on Ivanans and the Latvian taught the young McLeod a thing or two.

Joey: Speaking of past fights, our #5 entrant, B.J. Crombeen is hustling to the ring and targeting McLeod!

RD: Crombeen is HAMMERING away on McLeod!

Rob: Meanwhile Ivanans, Shelley and Orr are trying to eliminate each other but with no luck.  Looks like we’re settling in for a good rumble tonight.

RD: Wait a second, the 6th competitor, Dan Carcillo is also representing the Flyers tonight, along with Shelley.

Joey: Seems like we may have had another trade between the Flyers and another club.  This definitely gives the Flyers the advantage in the rumble.

Rob: And they’re taking advantage! Carcillo and Shelley just high fived and then double clotheslined Ivanans out of the ring.

RD: And the teamwork continues as the pair take out McLeod and Crombeen at the same time.  These guys could be unstoppable tonight!  (more…)